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Rebuilding Your Marriage

Marriage: a beautiful journey of love, partnership, and occasional “Did you seriously just do that?” moments. If you're reading this, you might be facing one of those “moments” that feel more like an extended season. Don’t worry, you’re not alone! Every couple hits rough patches. The good news? With a little effort, understanding, and yes, humor, you can navigate these choppy waters and come out stronger. Let’s dive into some practical tips to save your marriage and get things back on track.


1. Communication: The Bread and Butter (Hold the Arguments)

Remember when you used to talk for hours about everything and nothing? Communication is the key to any successful relationship. It’s not just about talking, but also about listening.

  • Talk Openly: Share your feelings honestly but kindly. Avoid the blame game.

  • Listen Actively: Sometimes, all your partner needs is for you to listen without interrupting or offering solutions.

  • Choose the Right Time: Don’t start deep conversations when you're tired or stressed. Find a calm moment.


2. Date Nights: Rekindle the Romance

When was the last time you went on a date? If you’re scratching your head, it’s been too long. Date nights don’t have to be extravagant. It’s about spending quality time together.

  • Plan Regular Dates: Whether it's a fancy dinner or a cozy night in with a movie, make it a priority.

  • Surprise Each Other: Leave a sweet note or plan a surprise outing. It’s the little things that count.


3. Learn to Laugh (Especially at Yourself)

Laughter is a great stress reliever and can bring you closer together. Find humor in the mundane and silly moments of life.

  • Watch a Comedy: Sometimes, a good laugh together is all you need.

  • Laugh at Mistakes: Everyone makes them. Laughing together at the small blunders can ease tension.


4. Teamwork Makes the Dream Work

Marriage is a partnership, and like any team, it requires cooperation and mutual support.

  • Share Responsibilities: Divide chores and tasks fairly. Teamwork in daily life can strengthen your bond.

  • Support Each Other’s Goals: Be each other’s cheerleader. Celebrate successes and offer a shoulder during setbacks.


5. Seek Professional Help: It’s Okay to Ask for Directions

There’s no shame in seeking help from a professional. Sometimes, an unbiased perspective can make a world of difference.

  • Counselling: Couples therapy can provide tools and strategies to improve your relationship.

  • Workshops and Seminars: Invest in your marriage by attending workshops designed to strengthen relationships.


6. Take Care of Yourself: You Can’t Pour from an Empty Cup

Self-care isn’t selfish; it’s essential. When you feel good about yourself, it reflects in your relationship.

  • Maintain Individual Interests: Keep up with hobbies and interests that make you happy.

  • Exercise and Eat Well: Physical health impacts mental well-being. A healthy body supports a healthy mind.


7. Practice Patience: Rome Wasn’t Built in a Day

Improving your marriage takes time and effort from both sides. Be patient with yourself and your partner.

  • Celebrate Small Wins: Every step forward, no matter how small, is progress.

  • Keep the Big Picture in Mind: Remember why you fell in love and focus on your long-term goals together.


8. Keep the Spark Alive: Flirt a Little

Just because you’re married doesn’t mean the flirting has to stop. Keep the romance alive with little gestures.

  • Compliments: A genuine compliment can go a long way.

  • Physical Affection: Hold hands, hug, and kiss. Physical touch is a powerful connector.


9. Revisit Your Vows: A Promise is a Promise

Remember those promises you made on your wedding day? Revisiting your vows can remind you of your commitment and love.

  • Renew Your Vows: Consider a vow renewal ceremony. It’s a beautiful way to reaffirm your commitment.

  • Daily Reminders: Keep a copy of your vows where you can see them regularly.



Saving your marriage is a journey filled with ups, downs, and a lot of learning. By implementing these tips with a dose of humor and a whole lot of love, you can turn this challenging time into an opportunity to strengthen your bond. Remember, it’s the small, consistent efforts that make the biggest difference. So, laugh a little, love a lot, and keep working towards a happily ever after.

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©2024 by Annanda Heck Counselling. 

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